Looking Out To Pixelation

So the guy who everyone has always laughed at for not being able to drink after someone else or drink after them* is now living in all of…this. And let me tell you, that isn’t causing any panic attacks, no sir. Meantime, lest we forget, the house was put on the market and sold within 48 hours and there are now less than 2 weeks left for me to rapidly dismantle the only safe harbor I’ve had the last 20 years. The only place I’ve been able to go when all of…this…becomes too…


…all so that I can go to…

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Yeah, I can’t finish that sentence because I don’t have a place yet. I’m looking out the door toward…something I can’t make out. It’s as if there’s just a blurry splotch on the other side of the door, the future is pixilated. Offices and banks are shuttering up. People aren’t returning phone calls. Damn virus has everything up in the air. I’ve had six months to prepare for this, I know, but I squandered so much of that time – thanks, grief and depression! Even with all that time, this is coming on so very suddenly.

I don’t even know how smart it is to sign anything contractual right now, anyway. What if our species dies out two days after the closing on the house? I’m going to be pissed if I’m stuck in a loan situation when all of humanity is wiped out. Best to take a wait and see approach.

I mean, I’m getting it done. Things are getting sorted, packed, thrown out or set aside to donate. I’m not sure WHY, but I’m doing it.

And now, random flamingos. Mom was really a flamingo nut. You might even say she had a leg up on all the other bird enthusiasts. Ahem.

I’m sorry about that. Did I mention I’m under a great deal of stress? Could even be the first signs of COVID-19 delirium or something.

*There are rules.

2 thoughts on “Looking Out To Pixelation

  1. I hope that you quickly find a new place to be, I know you’ve said it’s near impossible at the moment. I hope that changes.

    I also think we’re all struggling with the blurred out future. I get panicky (literally) even thinking about it, and I’m having a heck of a time keeping myself in check.

    I’m sorry this is all happening like this for you Karl. <3

    1. Thanks…just finished a nice panic attack myself, so I hear you. It’s an odd limbo state I’m in. I mean, by all accounts there is no stopping this from happening – the closing – I just don’t have a place to live yet. If this is going to be our brave new world, I’m already failing in the bravery department.

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